Do life and leadership together!
I don’t believe that discussions about life and leadership need to be scheduled or lectured to our children… the root word of leadership is LEAD… which is a VERB, not a noun… it’s a DOING word. Which means, in order to teach leadership effectively, particularly with children, it isn’t something you talk about, it’s something you DO. Here is a video of an every-day scenario I used to give my children a lesson on leadership.
If leadership is something you are still learning to master, and you have realised that maybe you have lived your life the way you were programmed to live it, which has been as a follower, not a leader, but you want to raise your children differently, then here is a great way to do that…
Until such time that everything you do is “leadership style”, just pick and choose your days to go out with your children and consciously LEAD. Look for opportunities to be of service to others, or to take control of a situation, or solve a challenge that may present itself. It could be helping an elderly person at the shops, or a scenario in the traffic where it is banked up and you choose NOT to wait and to follow the crowd, but to go your own way… maybe the way of the ‘unknown’, down some streets you’ve never been down before. Talk about the excitement of the challenge in finding a new way… a way you’ve never been before. And use it to have a discussion with your children and involve them in the conversation by asking for their ideas, input and to discuss their feelings. Tell them how you are feeling because this is what they buy into, and will become how they choose to feel.
For example, you’re in the car, stuck in traffic and you might say “hey guys, I’ve decided I don’t want to wait for the traffic today. I want to go on an adventure and find a new way. I want to be a leader, not a follower. Who wants to help me find a new way? Which way do you think we should go? Let’s try this way…” Then, as you’re driving down different streets, let them have some input as to where you should turn next, make statements like “oh this is exciting! I like doing new things and making different choices to other people. This is fun! It’s great to be a leader”
By doing this, you are storing files in the subconscious mind of your children that say that new and different things are exciting, not scary! You are teaching them to love challenging situations, and to have fun dealing with uncertainty, and not knowing which way to go. This is an important life skill. Life is FULL of uncertainty. Anxiety is associated with uncertainty if you aren’t taught how to feel about situations being uncertain. As we all know, anxiety can be a destructive force, so programming your children in this way will ‘wire their emotions’ in a way that can never produce anxiety. Teaching them to just TRUST that they will find the way.
Once this file is stored in their minds, it will be the only file they have available next time they are in a situation that is new, or different or challenging… in nanoseconds their subconscious mind will access the file that TAUGHT them what to do and how to feel in this situation… and they’ll have an empowering experience because you programmed them to THRIVE in this situation. You have given them the perspective that they will use at many times in their life, and therefore you have taught them how to feel in these situations.
Most importantly, you have taught them to use a feeling that serves them well! In a state of anxiety the brain cannot make decisions, which then creates more anxiety because people don’t know what to do next, which causes them to become frozen in their situation. So if you can program your children’s minds to create their own environment of excitement and thrill in uncertain situations, they will always maintain the ability to make decisions and move forwards. You are not just their parent, you are their leader!
Image source: FreeDigitalPhotos.net
